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"Ya got cigarettes? she asks. "Yes, I say,"I got cigarettes. "Matches? she asks."Enough to burn Rome. "Whiskey?"Enough whiskey for a Mississippi River of pain. "You drunk? "Not yet."
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"Never go for someone that represents something that is more of a fantasy than reality in this crazy world of lonely people, unless it is for the shortest time possible, and unless you have clearly figured out an exit strategy."

"I'm against solutions that are worse than the problem. Like old women who want their hair dyed the color of shoe polish to hide the gray."

"It may seem so easy to take it easy but, it is never so easy to take it easy."

"Realism can break a writer's heart."

"A realist is a slave to reality."

"The 'practical' man, as this word is often used, is one who recognizes only the material needs, who realizes that men must have food for the body, but is oblivious of the necessity of providing food for the mind."

"Okay, this is the wisdom. First, time spent on reconnaissanse is never wasted. Second, almost anything can be improved with the addition of bacon. And finally, there is no problem on Earth that can't be ameliorated by a hot bath and a cup of tea."

"Women can accept the fact that a man is a rotter, a swindler, a drug taker, a confirmed liar, and a general swine, without batting an eyelash, and without its impairing their affection for the brute in the least. Women are wonderful realists."

"Why harrow oneself by looking on the worst side?... Because it is sometimes necessary."
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