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"We decided that the French could never write user-friendly software because they're so rude."
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"When we see a good-looking woman with a not-so-good-looking man, we assume that the man must have a good bank balance. When we see a good-looking man with a not-so-good-looking woman, we assume that she must be good in bed."

"I think the thing that I most appreciate now is that stereotypes involving Jewish identity activate fears of persecution that exist in the present day."

"But she's a redhead, so she's probably evil, even at her tender age.''I thought you liked redheads.''I do. What's your point?"

"I was gravely warned by some of my female acquaintances that no woman could expect to be regarded as a lady after she had written a book."

"Gossip is when you hear something you like about someone you don't."

"We decided that the French could never write user-friendly software because they're so rude."
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"Make your goals big and broad enough so that they never become answered prayers and boomerang to curse you."

"When future archaeologists dig up the remains of California, they're going to find all of those gyms their scary-looking gym equipment, and they're going to assume that we were a culture obsessed with torture."

"When you write, it's just a much more crystalline, compressed version of the voice you think with - though not the one you speak with. I think your writing voice is your laser-guided missile. It's the poetry part of you."

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"Try not thinking of peeling an orange. Try not imagining the juice running down your fingers, the soft inner part of the peel. The smell. Try and you can't. The brain doesn't process negatives."
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