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"In school, I was an underachiever."
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"Never go to your high school reunion pregnant or they will think that is all you have done since you graduated."
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Personal Development

"Once in a while our school has half days, and the teachers spend the afternoon 'in service,' which I think must be a group therapy for having to deal with us."
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Personal Development

"School...school... is just nothing... if you think that you are going to learn something. You are here wrong, you wanna see the system?It's in about23 Channels as a start then increases... decreases... even with different topics in the end... they want you to recall the whole data from the 23 Channels as for Perfect, as For under Perfect Okay..okay... but still not perfect, as for Good... Just an Okay... and as for Middle... Little from there and little from there as for the last... Nothing at all."
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Personal Development

"When asked 'What do we need to learn this for?' any high-school teacher can confidently answer that, regardless of the subject, the knowledge will come in handy once the student hits middle age and starts working crossword puzzles in order to stave off the terrible loneliness."
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Personal Development

"You ought to go to a boy's school sometime. Try it sometime," I said. "It's full of phonies, and all you do is study so that you can learn enough to be smart enough to be able to buy a goddam Cadillac some day, and you have to keep making believe you give a damn if the football team loses, and all you do is talk about girls and liquor and sex all day, and everybody sticks together in these dirty little goddam cliques."
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Personal Development

"I didn't get an athletics scholarship at a major school."
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Personal Development

"I've taught Sunday school, I've sung in the choir, I directed a choir."
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Personal Development

"When I was in high school, I earned the pimple award and every other gross-out award."
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Personal Development

"I was always one who was clowning around in school and getting in trouble."
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Personal Development

"I dated the same girl all through high school."
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"Producing came about because I never wanted to be in one of those books, Where Are They Now?"
Books

"When Richie Cunningham drank too many beers, his parents sat him down and explained their concerns. If you live on this earth, you find out that we are all the same."
Earth

"To me acting is like a jigsaw puzzle. The jigsaw puzzle is of the sky and all the pieces are blue. Out of this you have to create a human being and put it together."
Acting

"Being down in Orlando, Florida, where we filmed the movie, I learned how to bass fish. Jerry Reed, who plays the villain in the movie, taught me how to bass fish."
Being

"I rode it once, which was up the driveway in the opening credits of the show. I didn't know how to stop it. I actually nearly killed the director of photography, and I smashed into the sound truck."
Photography

"That problem has been going on since men and women and their children moved from the plains and into caves. How many times have you heard Howard Cunningham talking to Marian about shopping? Too many."
Men

"If you make compelling television, they will come."
Television

"A human being's first responsibility is to shake hands with himself."
Being

"When you love what you do, then you're talking to one of the luckiest guys on the face of the earth."
Love

"In school, I was an underachiever."
School
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