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"Mad Rogan: "Resistance is futile."Nevada: "You are not assimilating me!"
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"We are not helpless...Many times in our lives we've been powerless, but not this night. Right now we have the power to choose the manner in which we die. If you have been a master of nothing else in all your days, you are now a master of this moment. And I for one am going to give such an answer to this insult that others will dearly regret not being by my side to see it!"

"There's a really stupid saying: When life hands you a lemon, make lemonade. Well, I have a better saying: When life hands you a lemon, shove that lemon up its stupid butt."

"She would thump them both, and she would apologize to neither."

"Beneath hot sun, desert roses bloomed. Under cold moon, I still refused to."

"Never! while heaven spares my reason, ' replied I, snatching away the hand he had presumed to seize and press between his own."
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"How can it not exist? What does that- A tiny grey body shot in front of the Land Rover. "Squirrel!Mad Rogan swerved to the side, trying to avoid the suicidal beast. The SUV hit a curb and jumped. For a terrifying second, we almost flew, weightless. My heart leaped into my throat. The heavy vehicle landed back on the pavement with a thud. The squirrel leapt into the grass on the other side.I remembered to breathe. "Thank you for not killing the squirrel."You're welcome, although now I want to go back and strangle it."

"Did I hurt you in the parking lot?""No, m'lady. I fell, so I could put a tracker on your car."Great."

"You might want to decide fast. We live in a dangerous world. If you see a chance to be happy, you have to fight for it, so later you have no regrets."

"At the door, Audrey called, "Are you coming?""No, just breathing hard, love." He glanced at her and was rewarded by an outraged glare, followed by, "Oh, my God!"

"It took a qualified wizard to detect a summoning in progress. It required only a half-literate idiot with a twitch of power and a dim idea of how to use it to attempt one. Before you knew it, a three-headed Slavonic god was wreaking havoc in downtown Atlanta, the skies were raining winged snakes, and SWAT was screaming for more ammo."

"Yes, Curran said. "We'd like you to officiate."I'm sorry?"We'd like you to marry us, I said.Roman's eyes went wide. He pointed to himself. "Me?"Yes, Curran said."Marry you?"Yes."You do know what I do, right?"Yes, I said. "You're Chernobog's priest."

"We took a right at the fork, heading farther north. The charred houses continued. To the right, a large sign nailed to an old telephone post shouted DANGER in huge red letters. Underneath in crisp black letters was written:IM-1: Infectious Magic AreaDo Not EnterAuthorized Personnel OnlyA second smaller sign under the first one, written on a piece of plastic with permanent marker, read:Keep out, stupid."We aren't going to keep out, are we? Ascanio asked."No."Awesome."

"Since I've moved here, you have shown up at my door eight times. I obey the laws, I pay my taxes, and I haven't even gotten a parking ticket in my entire time as a driver. Yet if anything at all happens in the neighborhood, you appear at my door. I bet if a meteorite fell somewhere in the subdivision, you would be here asking me if I personally launched it out of my doomsday cannon."

"Curran looked back at me. "Why is it you always attract creeps?""You tell me." Ha! Walked right into that one, yes, he did."
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