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"Don't look now but there's one man too many in this room and I think it's you!"
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"Woman is a vulgar animal from whom man has created an excessively beautiful ideal."

"If women are supposed to be less rational and more emotional at the beginning of our menstrual cycle when the female hormone is at its lowest level, then why isn't it logical to say that, in those few days, women behave the most like the way men behave all month long?"

"'Evil men have no songs.' How is it that the Russians have songs?"
Explore more quotes by Bert Kalmar

"You know you haven't stopped talking since I came here? You must have been vaccinated with a phonograph needle!"

"I'll see you at the theater tonight. I'll hold your seat til you get there. After that you're on your own."
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