"I've always been terrible on regular sitcoms with lots of jokes. I don't know how to tell jokes."

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"I've always been terrible on regular sitcoms with lots of jokes. I don't know how to tell jokes."

Exlpore more Jokes quotes

"You're gonna be like Aquaman? she asked. "Get the fish to fight for you?"Thanks, Percy said. "I haven't heard enough Aquaman jokes for one lifetime."

Rick Riordan, American Novelist

Jokes, Humor, Truth, Life, Power

"Leo. Jason said, you're wierd. Yeah, you tell me that a lot. Leo grinned. But if you don't remember me, that means I can reuse all my old jokes. Come on!"

Rick Riordan, American Novelist

Jokes, Humor, Truth, Happiness, Power

"A civil servant doesn't make jokes."

Eugene Ionesco, French Dramatist

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"I'm not a standup. I don't really have jokes. I don't have 10 minutes. It took a while for me to realize this."

Julia Sweeney, American Comedian

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"I don't consider myself a comic but a performer. A comic tells bad jokes."

Sandra Bernhard, American Actress

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"I guess they're tough jokes. But there's lots of things you either laugh or cry at. And you just can't cry."

Sam Kinison, American Comedian

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"My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' heads, where they are safe."

Emo Philips, American Comedian

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"You achieve the surreal jokes through the realism by making it elastic."

Dylan Moran, Irish Comedian

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"Johnny Carson started the jokes about me and Marlin in his monologues."

Jim Fowler, American Scientist

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"I'm not Mr. Debonair Suave. I'm just a regular boy who goofs around, pulls pranks, and makes jokes. That doesn't sound very hot to me."

Jensen Ackles, American Actor

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Explore more quotes by Rainn Wilson

"I think we're the only jokeless show on television. I mean really, we have no setups and no punch lines. It's not a joke show. There are funny lines and funny moments but again the comedy is born of the human experience and awkward pauses are a great part of what it is to be human."

Experience, Funny, Comedy, Moments

"Scotland is the Canada of England!"

Canada, Scotland

"I think Dwight loves being number two. I don't think he has any desire to be number one. He wants to be number two no matter where he goes. It's like Avis. 'We try harder.' That's Dwight."

Being, Desire

"The great challenge working on this show for me is wearing polyester all day long and having the worst haircut known to man at the top of my head and sitting under fluorescent lights. That is America, people. Polyester, bad haircuts, under fluorescent lights."

People, America, Challenge, Day

"Well, Dwight was born to be No. 2 and I don't think he would know what to do as a leader. But he loves following. He would have made a great fascist."

Leader,

"There was one point in high school actually when I was on the chess team, marching band, model United Nations and debate club all at the same time. And I would spend time with the computer club after school. And I had just quit pottery club, which I was in junior high, but I let that go."

Time, Chess, Computer, Debate

"What's interesting is the show allows for the awkward pauses to be captured, which makes it stylistically unique, especially for American audiences."

American, Audiences

"Pretty much anybody who's ever worked can relate to our show."

Pretty,

"I've always been terrible on regular sitcoms with lots of jokes. I don't know how to tell jokes."

Jokes,