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Patton Oswalt

"I've hung out in the writer's room a few times, but the fact is we've got such a good writing staff, I don't want to get my peanut butter fingerprints on anything."

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"I've hung out in the writer's room a few times, but the fact is we've got such a good writing staff, I don't want to get my peanut butter fingerprints on anything."

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"The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence whatever that it is not utterly absurd."

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"The animal is ignorant of the fact that he knows. The man is aware of the fact that he is ignorant."

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"He reproduced himself with so much humble objectivity, with the unquestioning, matter of fact interest of a dog who sees himself in a mirror and thinks: there's another dog."

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"I never knew a more presumptuous person than myself. The fact that I say that shows that what I say is true."

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"We're kind of wishing some parents would come back. And of course we're uneasy about the fact that we wish they'd come back - I mean, what's wrong with us?"

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"Almost any biographer, if he respects facts, can give us much more than another fact to add to our collection. He can give us the creative fact; the fertile fact; the fact that suggests and engenders."

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Asa Don Brown

"Space is almost infinite. As a matter of fact, we think it is infinite."

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Asa Don Brown

"Whoever wishes to keep a secret must hide the fact that he possesses one."

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Asa Don Brown

"Theory helps us to bear our ignorance of facts."

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Asa Don Brown

"Our relationship was cursed by the fact that we agreed on everything."

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Patton Oswalt
"I think I realized it was an art form at the beginning, but it took me a really long time before I was able to view what I was performing myself as an art form."
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Patton Oswalt
"I had a romance novel inside me, but I paid three sailors to beat it out if me with steel pipes."
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"90% of every art form is garbage - dance and stand-up, painting and music. Focus on the 10% that's good, suck it up, and drive on."
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"I mean, the death in the late eighties and early nineties really shook out a lot of hacks. The pond just sort of dried up for a lot of really bad comedians."
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"I have some shorter stories coming out in other books early next year. I might be pitching a re-vamp of Ghost Rider in the spring. We'll see."
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Patton Oswalt
"Yeah, there were a few years in the early nineties where I really began to hate what was valued as funny and just sort of what was valued in stand-up, period."
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Patton Oswalt
"If you hit a midget on the head with a stick, he turns into 40 gold coins."
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Patton Oswalt
"I hate all sidekicks."
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Patton Oswalt
"I mean, all alternative comedy is are comedians that have being doing it for so long, for so long, that they were relaxed enough to start becoming personal on stage."
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Patton Oswalt
"It's like our country is being run by a bunch of bad alcoholic dads right now."
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