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"If somebody says 'I love you' to me, I feel as though I had a pistol pointed at my head. What can anybody reply under such conditions but that which the pistol holder requires? 'I love you, too'."
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"Some people are like thorns. But you have to let them be thorns, because thorns can't turn into petals. The trick is not letting them prick you; never let a thorn prick you!"
"Those who laugh with you when you laugh are acquaintances, those who cry with you when you cry are companions, and those who do both are friends."
"Behind you, leave your enemies. Beside you, keep your family. Around you, maintain your friends. Within you, cherish God."
"Ok. You fuck me, then snub me. You love me, you hate me. You show me a sensitive side, then you turn into a total asshole. Is this a pretty accurate description of our relationship."
"Man loves pleasure. But women desire purposeful commitment."
"Enemies are often former or potential friends who have been denied - or think that they have been denied - something."
"Behind you, leave your enemies. Beside you, keep your family. Around you, maintain your friends. Within you, treasure God."
"Just because our friendship has changed and now we grow in different directions, does not mean that we have to grow apart."
"I just want one person I can rescue and I want one person who needs me. Who can't live without me. I want to be a hero, but not just one time."
"And someone he scarcely knew moved towards him and knelt beside him and whispered, 'Sir, was you calling out for me? Sir, I know I know,' and touched him."
Explore more quotes by Kurt Vonnegut
"Still and all, why bother? Here's my answer. Many people need desperately to receive this message: I feel and think much as you do, care about many of the things you care about, although most people do not care about them. You are not alone."
"She upset Billy simply by being his mother. She made him feel embarrased and ungrateful and weak because she had gone to so much trouble to give him life, and to keep that life going, and Billy didn't really like life at all."
"About astrology and palmistry: they are good because they make people vivid and full of possibilities. They are communism at its best. Everybody has a birthday and almost everybody has a palm."
"The statue was of a nude woman playing a slide trombone. It was entitles, enigmatically, Evelyn and Her Magic Violin."
"...a plausible mission of artists is to make people appreciate being alive at least a little bit."
"Being a Humanist means trying to behave decently without expectation of rewards or punishment after you are dead."
"[Books] were devices as crassly practical for storing or transmitting language, as the latest Silicon Valley miracles. But by accident, not by cunning calculation, books, because of their weight and texture, and because of their sweetly token resistance to manipulation, involve our hands and eyes, and then our mind and souls, in a spiritual adventure."
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