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"President Bush has been silent on Schwarzenegger. Of course, he can't pronounce Schwarzenegger."
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"Well, when you come down to it, I don't see that a reporter could do much to a president, do you?"
"There's never a dearth of reasons to shoot at the President."
"George W. Bush is not only a great president; he was a great candidate."
"One of your tasks is to separate the "personal" from the "substantive." The two can become confused, especially if someone rubs the President wrong."
"This President is going to lead us out of this recovery."
"The President is going to benefit from me reporting directly to him when I arrive."
"I'm glad Reagan is president. Of course, I'm a professional comedian."
"Of the fellows least likely to be president, you'd have to vote Jack No. 1."
"The last thing I wanted to do was to be a wartime President."
Explore more quotes by David Letterman
"Yesterday Senator John Kerry changed his mind and now supports the ban on gay marriages. I'm telling you this guy has more positions than Paris Hilton."
"New York now leads the world's great cities in the number of people around whom you shouldn't make a sudden move."
"No one knows if Saddam is still alive. They keep showing old footage of him on TV saying that it's live. You know, it's like the same thing we do with Dick Cheney."
"Dick Cheney said he was running again. He said his health was fine, 'I've got a doctor with me 24 hours a day.' Yeah, that's always the sign of a man in good health, isn't it?"
"Last night the United States dropped four 2,000 pound bombs on Saddam Hussein. I don't know anything about explosives, but, my God, do those things even need to explode?"
"President Bush has said that he does not need approval from the UN to wage war, and I'm thinking, well, hell, he didn't need the approval of the American voters to become president, either."
"It's official, Arnold said he will enter the race for governor. At least that's what everybody thinks he said."
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